I have been down the weight loss road many times throughout my life, but something feels very different this time in how I am approaching it all. I am trying to recognize those differences so that this is my last big battle with maintaing a healthy weight. The biggest difference I notice is that I am more focused on my total health than the numbers on the scale…and that mindset makes me see all of this as a gift to myself rather than a penance.
I am eating much better and am eating a lot less than I was, but in no way am I starving myself or feeling deprived, unlike my past attempts…just learning to be more attuned to my body and its signals. I have been an emotional eater my whole life, and after all these years, I am finally figuring out how to separate the two. Facing the emotions instead of eating them.
The meditation, visualization, and exercise work together to alter my mental picture of myself. Now I am seeing myself as healthy, not overweight and unattractive like I was before (self-fulfilling prophecy). Even though I have a way to go with weight loss, I am already seeing myself as successful. I am eating in a way I know I will have to eat forever, and I like it. I am not on a “diet”…I’ve been on every diet in the world, and they don’t work- at least not for me. I have to find a way to live and stick with it for the long haul.
Thinking this way is permeating everything in my life. I feel more mentally clear and calm, and more focused on my professional goals, as well. I have no doubt that there will be peaks and valleys, but I feel better suited to face them now. I feel like I am getting to truly know myself this summer, warts and all, living in more honesty and authenticity. Still lots of work to do, but the idea of being a continual work in progress energizes me. We change throughout our lives, life events shape us, and so our needs change. It’s healthy to periodically reevaluate where we are and where we want to be…and I was due for an overhaul. As long as we are open to self-reflection and change, anything is possible. I am embracing who I am right now- faults included- and am excited to see where this new approach takes me.