How many years have I wasted on fear?
Fear that I am somehow lacking
no matter how hard I work;
fear of things that would indeed come to pass,
fear about things that never would.
Why, when something good happens,
when I feel great happiness,
am I terrified that that something will happen to take it all from me?
Why do I live in a constant state of anxiety,
waiting for the other shoe to drop?
I am better than this, I know;
Or maybe I don’t.
Every reaction ingrained,
I seem predestined to cower in the shadows,
never allowing the full light of the sun to shine on my face.
I’m so weary of being chained to fear,
dreaming of the day I finally break free
and truly live my life,
all barriers shattered,
light streaming all around me.