I have been on my own this weekend, as Dan is out of town working the Kentuck Arts Festival for the last time in his career. I would have to loved to have joined him, but I had to stay and play on a recital last night and practice for my Tennessee tour with the UAB Chamber Trio that starts early tomorrow. This semester is proving to be a real challenge of time management and self-preservation.
As I had this time alone, I decided to make the most of it, calling it my ‘spa weekend’. I never feel lonely when I’m alone; I love being with Dan, but I also deeply cherish and crave time to myself, time to recharge my batteries, go inward and think through things, as well as take care of several chores around the house (house and yard therapy). Being on my own provides the opportunity for me to look at my life, my relationship, and my home, with fresh eyes, to see the many reasons that I have to be grateful. I am so very like my mother in that need to nest, to have my home reflect what I love, and the joy that I feel about it all. So many gifts all around me.
As I sit here on this quiet Sunday morning, I am embracing the solitude. The windows are open, the birds are singing, and I hear the fountain gurgling away outside. The animals are quiet, seeming to understand my need for peace. I have a busy day of practicing, house cleaning, and yardwork ahead of me (and making a crockpot of turkey-pumpkin chili to welcome Dan home), but for now, I am soaking in the gift of just being.
I can feel the tangled threads of my worry-wart brain begin to relax and unwind as the gentle Fall breeze touches me. My body lets go of long-held tension and seems to melt into my comfortable old chair. I look around this eclectic, funky century-old home that Dan and I have poured our hearts into; I see the animals that bring such joy to us. I look out at the view that never fails to lift my spirits and inspire me. I am living deeply in the moment in gratitude. What a beautiful thing.